Another week, another “dad” stepping on mom’s pregnant toes.
So there’s this New England guy, Aaron Gouveia of “The Daddy Files,” who seems to “think” it’s a man’s job to actively participate in the decision-making usually reserved for a pregnant woman, decisions like naming the baby, circumcising the baby, breastfeeding the baby, and finding out the sex of the baby while still in mom’s tummy. Outrageous! This “Gouveia” character is probably the type to say things like “we’re pregnant!” with a Kool-Aid smile on his face as if he has anything more to do with bringing a baby into this world. As if.
This “opinionated” Red Sox fan needs to stay out of the kitchen, his wife’s kitchen, and let her find out if she is having a boy or a girl. Instead of continuing to “insert” himself where he doesn’t belong any longer, “Mr.” Gouveia and all men need to head to their garage and build something for the baby, WITH THEIR OWN TWO HANDS. Expecting fathers need to “man-up” and be of some actual use to their family, and make their wife’s new baby a crib or a bookshelf or at the very least a frame with which to hang a photo of mom and baby.
In this guy’s warped world where a baby’s gender isn’t known until delivery, a new dad will not be able to ready his shotgun for the arrival of his new daughter, meaning nasty boyfriends will ALREADY have a leg up. A LEG UP! It is “unacceptable” for a daddy to not protect his little princess from boys, from the very moment she is born. Without the advanced warning he will soon have a daughter, a dad will, in all likelihood, be left standing on the hospital steps, watching his precious newborn baby girl ride off with a tattooed boy, TATTOOED!, on a motorcycle, A MOTORCYCLE!, minutes after being born. A man must be prepared to fight for his daughter from birth.
Another ridiculous “point” made by “Aaron Gouveia” is that baby boys should be wearing greens and yellows, which is, of course, more of the politically correct liberal BS we have to hear from “men” like Gouveia. Any good parent will tell you that pretty young girls are to be dressed exclusively in pink and handsome little boys in blue and blue alone. That’s the way it has always been and the way it should be. The mere idea that a boy should be seen in “green,” “yellow,” or, god forbid, “red” — which is WAY too close to pink — helps to prove what most decent people in this world already know: men are clueless when it comes to parenting. A boy in RED/PINK??? What’s next, your son falling in love with another boy?? Is this what Gouveia wants for your boy??? To be safe, both of my girls have been dressed in pink since they squeezed their way out of their mom, thus preserving their femininity and making them as attractive as possible to potential suitors. How can I possibly expect to marry my girls off to a prince if they are not princess pink every moment of their lives? This Gouveia fella doesn’t seem to have all the answers now does he? DOES HE??
Finally, this Boston-area “writer” seems to be unaware of the dangers of “surprises” and is advocating that the shock of finding out if you are the dad to a boy or a girl is a “good” thing. A GOOD THING!?!? He is conveniently ignoring the 100% true, fair & balanced fact that people can die from shock. DIE! Apparently, this blogger has never jumped into the freezing cold Pacific Ocean. Apparently, this blogger has never stood too close to the lion cage at the zoo. Apparently, this blogger has never put on actual pants at the bus stop. YOU COULD DIE FROM SURPRISE AND SHOCK. Apparently, this “daddy blogger” wants all babies to grow up without fathers, because he wants you to “die” from the “amazing” surprise you’ll get in the delivery room. This man is a menace to society and must be stopped.
It is our duty to combat this kind of dangerous thinking if we hope to preserve American Family Values. Pregnant moms must find out the sex of their children the moment they are conceived, if not sooner, so we dads can start building shit in the proper color palette and have plenty of time to get our manly asses over to Wal-Mart to begin assembling our arsenal of guns to defend our daughter’s chastity.
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