Parenthood: the fastest path to a Master’s Degree in Disgusting.
Had you asked me a decade ago what I knew about poop, rashes, or how long it takes food at the bottom of a backpack to morph into an unrecognizable science experiment, I would have stared blankly at you.
Today? I know more about the colon’s role in the body’s expulsion of waste, have had two food allergy children, and instinctively reach for rubber gloves when cleaning out school bags when summer break rolls back around.
But this month’s lesson brought me to tears; the ultimate “please god NO” moment arrived. The dreaded lice letter came home with my 8-year-old son. He didn’t understand why my face wrinkled in despair as my toddler hung on my leg, begging for a snack; my 11-year-old walked through the back door after flag football practice, tossing his sweaty uniform headband on the counter; and (as some cruel gesture from the universe in that moment) my 8-year-old started scratching his scalp. Let’s just say, I did NOT handle it well. “Don’t touch ANYTHING! Any of you!!!”
My best friend and worst enemy, Google, gave me more information than I ever should read about one topic. Like how I hit the jackpot – lice most commonly affect kids age 3-11 (the exact age range of my three children) because they are most likely to have head-to-head contact with each other, providing the lice a bridge to run across (joy of joys). And the sheer number of opinions out there on how to remove said lice and their eggs (called “nits”… which gave a whole new meaning to my texting typos when I misspelled “not”). Overwhelm doesn’t even describe it. Shampoos, wet combing, or oils? Home remedies. Pediatric recommendations. Pesticides. And all I can hear in my head is, “Whywhywhywhy whyyyyyyyy???”
Combing out the Teeny Demons
After I allowed myself the initial breakdown, I decided to just head over to the Dollar General and get my hands on some products, read some boxes, and narrow my options down. Standing in front of what felt like a WALL of options, I ran through our family’s needs: Affordable, low on chemicals, and easy to use (because toddlers). Thirty-seven minutes later, I decided to give WelComb® a try (welcome to the garbage can, lice!) The wet combing method seemed like the lowest impact on my kids’ scalps and the tools are simple – a little bottle of conditioner, a detangler comb to unsnaggle and distribute the conditioner, and a WelComb®, to comb out the teeny demons. And luckily all of these tools are sold together in the Dollar General Lice and Nit Removal Kit with WelComb®! Though helpful in the lice removal process, all of this would be promptly tossed after ridding my kids of lice. We will NOT be using it for school picture day, thank you very much. But since this was our life for the next few weeks, however, I did take note that soaking the comb in hot water allowed for reuse (my frugal nature overruled my inner hypochondriac for the next few weeks).
Once I settled into the this-is-my-life-now mentality, the combing process became routine. And honestly? It developed into a time to connect with my kids every few days. Check in and get some one-on-one time, even if it was just at the bathroom sink. I pray my children have retained the don’t share hats, brushes, combs, headbands… you know what? Just stop sharing lecture (ok… maybe I went a little far there. Although I kind of think I could count my nearly-three-year-old a booming success if I just went with it).
Those evening sessions combing out lice and nits became a blessing in disguise, even if it accredited me in another level of disgusting, albeit without fear, no drama, and absolutely no pesticides.
We lived. Just in time for the next, “Hey Mom……..?”
If your children come home with the lice letter, all you need to do is stop by your local Dollar General to pick up a Dollar General Lice and Nit Removal Kit with WelComb®. It has all you need and nothing you don’t to get rid of lice and nits with ease!
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