Parenting Blog

Plateau Running

Comedian Louis C.K. quipped in a recent episode of his eponymously titled show on FX that at 40+ years of age his trips to the gym serve only to maintain his middling shape.  Gone are his dreams of a chiseled self.  He is, essentially, exercising to not become grotesque. To stay on a plateau.

I’m not quite there yet.  At just-about-36 I have to have a belief that there is still time to alter my physical being in a meaningful way.  So much so that on Monday I bought the most expensive pair of sneakers I’ve ever owned.  Even at $70, these Nike Dual Fusion ST 2 running shoes are a rather modest investment in my self, in my own longevity.  For whatever incremental damage is being caused to me by the $1.49 double chocolate chip muffins from Wegmans bakery, these handsome new kicks will be expected to see and raise ’em a few shillings.  Also helpful would be ceasing consumption of $1.49 double chocolate chip muffins.

The wearing of these particular sneakers are akin to sliding your feet into cumulus clouds.  I’ve never felt such a beautiful feeling on my feet outside of a spa pedicure (that’s right).  Being a betting man, I’m laying down $70 on the idea that they’ll make it much easier for me to walk & to run a bit longer. And a bit faster. And a bit more often.  So that I may live a bit longer.

I like rolling hills way too much to pitch a tent on a plateau just yet.

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