I was the over-sized cargo shorts in the back row, on the aisle. I was the Fidel Castro shirt-jacket, pressed up tightly against the wall, eyes closed, mouthing every word. I apologize for playing so much air bass guitar, and so flamboyantly. I couldn’t help myself. I was the shaggy […]
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We were a few towns over, driving empty streets towards a dinner we’d soon let slip our minds. Maybe the place was shaped like an airplane, propped up like a roadside museum piece weathered inside and out. A Smithsonian reject, doomed to live out its string in a suburban nowhere. […]
I push back from the driveway early tomorrow, in the chalkboard landscape of morning while absorbing the cold sucker punch of a winter bully, alone with a tangerine orange carry-on and a groggy quarter smile, a couple of hours before they’ll wake and start a new day. Hugs, books, laughs, […]
I published a simple list post about minivans on OWTK a bit ago. Maybe you read it. Maybe you liked it. Hell, I’m even lazy enough to use the exact same photo from it here. HuffPost Parents later asked me to expand on it, make it beefier, make it funnier, […]
Caption these photos (either one, they are of the same antiquity at the Getty Villa in Santa Monica, CA — I wanted to provide you with two angles) and win a fun prize worth winning! Simple, right? Be funny, be crude, be awesome. Check out those 1st gen USB ports!! […]
There was a cavernous banquet hall. A lot of yellow. A bit of paisley on the papered walls. Soft rugs. Vertical stripes. Polished brass-rimmed chairs, standard issue ballroom stuff, the kind that easily stack in columns of 5, 6, maybe 7. The entirety of the audience that had gathered was […]
Don’t be a moron behind the wheel…your future drivers are watching.
