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The Big Guy Car Guy Report — 2014 Toyota Tundra

There isn’t a topic I’m less qualified to discuss than cars. Seriously.

I mean, I’ve got this much down like a champ: gas is on the right/brake is on the left, but really more centrally located down there if I were to be specific. Oh! And my gas goes in on the passenger side. I understand your filling-up experience may be different.

So yeah, vehicle expert I am not.

What in the hell then am I doing starting a story series on cars? Well I’m a dad, a big and tall dad to be particular about it, so while I cannot and probably will never be able to tell you what is ideal under the hood for max performance (or something), I’ll leave that to my new pal Stirling Matheson, I happen to be more than qualified to tell you what will work or not work for families looking for a car or truck or minivan to grow with, road trip in, and use to swing around to the grocery store to pick up milk early in the morning so that your wife can make herself a cup of tea when she wakes up.

Sound reasonable enough? I hope so, ’cause here starts what I am calling the Big Guy Car Guy Story Series right now, with the newest Tundra truck from Toyota. Ride on.


2014 Toyota Tundra 1794 Edition

The newly redesigned Tundra is Bad.Ass. There’s really no other way to say it. With a grill that not only puffs out its chest, but puffs it out and then slaps you across the face with its impressive chiseled chrome pecs, Toyota has made its popular 1/2-ton pickup more muscular, yes, but the story of this 3rd generation Tundra’s strength doesn’t end there.


Physical strength is only a piece of the Tundra equation. On the inside of the stunning 1794 Edition, the premium blend of the 2014 Tundra, you will find a level of craftsmanship and countless intuitive design elements customary in luxury sedan’s like Lexus and Mercedes-Benz. No one ever said truck folk had to settle for 2nd best. The ’14 Tundra is more America than ‘Murica, if you get my meaning.

As a big guy and a father I was immediately struck by the leg, hip, knee, elbow, and head room inside the cockpit and the massive Crew Max 2nd row of seating. The cabin of this new Tundra is as spacious as a family room, and with just about as much technology (via the Entune entertainment console.) Imagine a small Manhattan apartment, only with fine leather appointments, wickedly cool a/c and with more storage space. And on wheels, natch.

Of course interior space is crucial, but storage is also key for any car or truck to be fashioned as a family vehicle — storage for grocery bags, suitcases, bikes, and 2x4s for building your kid a backyard rocketship from scratch. Okay, maybe I couldn’t build something like that, but the 5.5′ bed and optional hard & lockable bed cover gives your family the flexibility necessary to pack up and go… to the library, lumber yard, or to hike the Appalachian Trail. Stereotypically poor V8 fuel economy might dent your wallet, but if you can afford this truck in the first place, you probably won’t care too much.

OWTK 2014 Toyota Tundra 1794 Edition Photo

And if you need or want to tow say, a camper or a horse, the 2014 Tundra’s powerful 5.7L V8 engine can pull it, and pull it off, with tremendous ease. At the Tundra Preview event I attended last week, I drove a ’14 Tundra and pulled a horse trailer, full-size camper, and a NASCAR-style trailer up, down and around an airport runway. The amazing bit? Whether I pushed the Haul Mode button or not, I couldn’t even tell that I was towing something. No kidding. I kept looking back to see if my load became disconnected because the Tundra engine is so strong, towing was a proverbial walk in the park. It was also the manliest thing I’ve ever done. I was a barreling through a wall of fire away from staring in my own Toyota truck commercial.

I want to tell you that the ’14 Tundra has Vortex Generators because I’m 91% certain this means the pickup truck doubles as a time machine. I could be wrong about this. It might just have something to do with air flow, drag, and fuel efficiency. You know, boring stuff unrelated to time travel.


The backseat can fit three adults comfortably, so the 2014 Tundra will certanly accommodate your young children now and continue to serve your family well as your tots grow up and become full fledged people. 😉

Toyota Tundra 2014 1794 Edition Console

And because these Tundra trucks are built to last for eons (okay, maybe half an eon) your rear-facing baby today will have lots of leg room in two decades time. And in two decades time, the metallic burnt orange exterior and bolder orange inside the 1794 Edition of the 2014 Tundra will still be mad stylish and 125% awesome.


The back seats fold up in a 60/40 split offering a family lots of storage space inside the Crew Max cab too. I feel like that’s gonna be super cool for the 3-person family. Although an only-child may bristle at sharing his space in the CrewMax with some luggage, it’s better than splitting up Christmas gifts every year with a sibling. And a carry-on won’t rip your 3DS out of your hands either.


The 2014 Tundra family extends beyond, or below I guess, the classy 1794 Edition. There are different grades, price points, features, and fabrics throughout the lineup, but none that combine the grace, power, and style with the level of poetry this 1794 Edition does. It is a breathtaking vehicle.

I would never have described myself as a ‘truck guy’ before last week, but the 2014 Toyota Tundra 1794 Edition is so gorgeous inside and out, so strong and capable (even if I am not always), and so roomy for a big active family, that I have developed a new and thoroughly unexpected crush.

*I was put up and fed well at the Nemacolin Woodlands Resort in western PA during the 2014 Tundra Preview event. The opinions expressed above are honest and unbiased, as always.

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